Happy Valentines Day

In honor of V-Day here are a few laughs:

Worst thing to say on a first date

I used to have a real bad bedwetting problem ... but the last couple of weeks I've gotten it under control.

I know we just met and this might seem a little sudden ... but could I borrow five hundred dollars?

Go ahead and Super Size - I found spare change in the sofa today.

Something tells me that you're very special ... but with medication I can usually ignore it.

I don't see my ex-girlfriend that much ... thanks to the U.S. Department of Justice."

I had a good time tonight. I'd love to see you again in six to eight months with good behavior.